Zindagi Ek Paheli

I tried enough to keep you a secret Jike. I was not happy at all about you getting any sort of publicity.Why?The line of thought was that I become too sentimental and too personal with my posts and never I did I want any publicity to my miseries.I read what so many others write(has become a sort of addiction these days) and writing too has become an addiction for me.But I have refrained myself from commenting on any of these posts of others for the same reason as above. What I do is, ping that person concerned on IM and say something like this: "Hey, know what? That post of yours was too good." ."Your snaps are all looking good". "I too share your opinion on this".And all they would ask me back is "If you liked it so much, then why didnt you comment it there itself!?". Well, then I would start my story once again.I have even asked people who had link to my page from theirs to remove the same: All for hiding you from 'most' of the world.Now, yesterday, I found one more page that has an invitaion to visit you, my son, and I very well know the person whose page that was.So,on my way to work today, this was on my "To-do List" for today. Ask this person too to remove the link pointing to you.

Steven Spielberg: One of America's most acclaimed directors. Double time Oscar winner(guess thats the right info). There was this particular tele-serial which he produced. It was called 'Taken'. It had ten episodes in total: Story of aliens coming on to earth and people are taken away to their planet and some sort of research is done on them. The central character of Taken was a small girl, who gets conceived in an alien airship when both her parents are taken. Now after few years, the aliens come back to take her away forever. Now, this whole story is told through the eyes of this small child and she tells all funny good things. One thing i remember still from Taken is this(this the child says in her narration): "Life is all about asking questions and not knowing the answers. There would be many situations in your life, when for most of the questions you ask, you wont find an answer. But still, keep asking questions". This thought I liked it a lot. And what are these questions, i used to question. The greatest puzzle in everybody's life I think is to understand what you really are. So the questions you should be asking would be like: Who are you? What are you? Why are you? Why are you the way you are you? Are you OK with the way you are you?. If we find sincere and honest answers to these, then I guess Life becomes smooth.

I have been asking these questions so many times to myself and yeah what I found was I am weird. But yeah, who else is not weird on this earth? Everyone is weird in their own way. Nobody is perfect. Yeah, true that I tell about most of my miseries to you, now does that mean that all those who are reading it along with you are "the" happy chaps on this earth? No, definitely not. Just that they dont write it out publicly (Reminds me of this Tamil song from Padayappa, where our Superstar sings and asks us to point out who else apart from a child and a sage who are really happy on this earth). Ok,lets see, I get this link unlinked from this person as well.

Do I know, how many are reading this with you without my knowledge? I dont know.
Do I know, how many have linked to you? I dont know.
Do I know, whether a casual search on Google my some Mr. or Ms. XYZ from some corner of the earth on something else would end up listing you? I dont know.

So if there are so many "I dont know", is my purpose of keeping you secret is 'truly' satisfied? I dont kn...Stop.. Go to hell... What the heck am i trying to do? Shit. This is more crap than what I thought. Also remember Gerorge Truman telling this to William Truman on the day when he is awarded by his company for his achievements at work. He says something like this: "Will, I am happy that you are here. I know you are queer. But I love you my dear". Yes, thats it. Thats so true. If I am queer, am miserable,so are others with their own miseries hiding behind their back. And these people would love me for whatever I am.

PS:
1. For all those who were unhappy with me for not commenting: Yeah, I would definitely from now on. (Although am scared at reading some blogs where the level of intellect is so so high and sometimes I dont understand completely whats being said)
2. For all those whom I asked to unlink Jike from their page: Well, I dont know.Thanks for listening to me. I cant say, please put that back again. If you still wish to, yes go ahead. I dont mind anymore.